SLIM JIM CHAOS

The only Slim Jim plant in the U.S. exploded last month because of a natural gas leak and no Slim Jims have been made since then.

I thought those only existed in random Mohawk and Husky gas stations but the NY Post says the shortage is causing hoarding and panic everywhere... mostly with truckers? Just guessing.

Their article "Where's the Beef? Slim Jim Factory Can't 'Meat'Production Needs" says that "like the infamous "Seinfeld" episode, in which Elaine begins hoarding the Sponge after the female contraceptive is taken off the market, analysts are bracing for a big summer Slim Jim run."

There is such a thing as a Slim Jim analyst? Please tell me it's Macho Man Randy Savage.



The company who makes the product,ConAgra, is rumored to make as many as 500 million of those salty bastards every year! That equals $250 million in sales annually!

ConAgra said it won’t return to full Slim Jim production until the fall. I say a mouth full of beer and Beef Jerky will get you through the drought.

Crisis averted. Phew.